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Post by Tulip on Nov 26, 2003 21:04:21 GMT -5
this is from an actual transcript of a case.  Q: doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? A: no Q: did you check for a blood pressure? A: no Q: did you check for breathing? A: no Q: so, it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? A: no Q: how can you be so sure doctor? A: because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. Q: but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? A: yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere. attorneys.....gotta love em! |
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Fisher
xTeam
If a Stamped Ever Happens to Run at You, Never Stop and Shout Jumangi, it Doesn't Work!!!!
Posts: 3,187
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Post by Fisher on Nov 27, 2003 16:23:39 GMT -5
haha, tulip send me that email, i remember gettin that ages ago:P lol
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Post by Ohio on Dec 1, 2003 16:23:56 GMT -5
Hey, attorneys practice law in hopes to some day be a professional. Sadly none have lived long enough to become pro.
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Post by Mystical on Dec 1, 2003 17:30:43 GMT -5
lol,  |
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Post by Flower on Mar 13, 2004 2:02:01 GMT -5
I have seen some really funny things put on claim forms over the years. I got these few from a law group I belong to and they are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarise the details of an accident in the fewest possible words.
This Norwich Union customer collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were..
Q - What warning was given by you?
A - Horn
Q - What warning was given by the other party?
A - Moo
Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident?
A: Travelled by bus?
The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull.
I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it.
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.
I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.
I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.
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Post by Cope on Mar 13, 2004 2:14:22 GMT -5
lol... Ive seen most of those before. Good at any rate.
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